The Betrayal of Loyalty

How our lesser self serves no one.

Twenty-five years ago, my freedom battled loyalty and lost. 😌 

“You’re not going away to college.” was my aunt’s retort as I told her I was looking for a dorm room. 

My mother had passed a few years back, and I was left caring for my 8yr old sister along with my aunt. 

My aunt had been there for my sister and I during the crisis of my mother’s passing. 

However, she was more than my aunt, she was her own person, with her own past relationships. 

As a 17 year old I failed to see her as the person who had been the middle child who took on a lot of responsibility at a young age, while sacrificing her youth. 

When she dismissed my desire to go away, I quickly conceded as I felt the pangs of guilt shudder through my body. 

I didn’t know it at the time, but my self-sacrifice would come at a cost, greater than the benefit it bestowed to those around me. 

I sacrificed my Self at the expense of my lesser self:  

The self that didn’t know how to stand up for himself. 

The self who desperately yearned for petty validation. 

The self that didn’t think his dreams were notable enough.  

I was the one being sacrificed - not offering sacrifice. 

My unformed heart had been consecrated to the sacred groves of the shadow ceremony, where congregants follow the tribal virtues of guilt, cloaked in self-anointed garments of loyalty. 

Years later I would still repeat the same pattern of circumventing my own needs through pleasing others.

I’d work a job where I thought I could attain money, rather than work for love.

I’d show up at events where I was “expected” rather than accepted.

I’d follow the rules of society’s relationship roadmap, not knowing my true north.

Loyalty and sacrifice are often misunderstood, as they’re emotionally imposed on us at a young age, by parents who have their own meanings of the word. 

Loyal comes from legal, and means “faithful in carrying out legal obligations, honorable.”

We’ve allowed the legal concept of loyalty to ironically betray those closest to us.  

How was I being loyal to my aunt if I was only betraying myself, and not honouring my own obligations to develop my core? 

Would society rather have a man who is shackled to reigns of guilt, or a man who unleashes his chariot to hurl through the eminent obstacles of his civilization? 

How do we release the guilt that allows us to steer our destiny?  

How can we remedy betrayal in our lives? 

Through learning how to concoct its antidote: 

Loyalty to Self. 

Follow me as I help you craft your own psychic elixirs of loyalty, honor, and commitment to Self. 

Don’t compromise. Seek 𝗵𝗶𝗴𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗵.